that is to say thursday at 11

DARK CITY

If you’ve only seen director Alex Proyas’  I, Robot film you could be forgiven for not being excited about this broadcast, but I’m telling you.  If I ever gave you reason to trust me I’ll cash it in now.  Forget that movie.  Dark City is great.  Like a Saturday morning cartoon of The Matrix but darker, ballsier and smarter.

The first three minutes storyboarded.  With voices.

I’m not.  Gattaca in 20, which is to say at 11:00.

The Plucky Sidekick announces an extra-special last-minute surprise screening of Groundhog Day, in honor of … Groundhog Day.

8pm Pacific, 11 Eastern.

GATTACA

February 4 / 11 EST

In a future whereGattaca gets its title from the nitrogenous bases of DNA, adenine, thymine, guanine and cytosine, shortened to ATGC.  I don’t know if that excites you, but it’s a fucking auspicious start to me.  IMDb says,

In the not-too-distant future, a less than perfect man wants to travel to the stars. Society has categorized Vincent Freeman as less than suitable given his genetic make-up and he has become one of the underclass of humans that are only useful for menial jobs. To move ahead, he assumes the identity of Jerome Morrow, a perfect genetic specimen who is a paraplegic as a result of a fall. With some professional advice, Vincent learns to deceive DNA and urine sample testing. When a colleague is killed he is finally scheduled for a space mission, but a colleague suspects his origins and the police begin an investigation.

It sells itself so well.  It makes its philosophical points clearly and beautifully, the tension is perfect and ever present, the plot is engaging and clicheless, but forget about that.  What I can’t get over is how completely I believe the world it’s set in.  Once you’re introduced to Gattaca you’re living in it.  Aside from careful attention to detail and structure, a big reason for that is the characters.  It’s science fiction that cares deeply about its characters, making them realistic and compelling and making sure they react to the world around them the way real people would.  Gattaca is an amazing movie.

Today I met this.

Official promotional materials (an iPhone wallpaper) for an anime miniseries licensed by Funimation, who are as mainstream as anime localization gets.  Curious, thought I.  A quick googling brought up a blurb about it which I present in annotated form.

“Rin Asougi is an immortal private detective” hilarious “with a thirst for vodka and a talent for attracting things that go bump in the night.” HILARIOUS “In a series of nightmarish vignettes spanning sixty-five years,” that sounds okay “Rin’s lush body” that’s a creepy way to describe somebody “is sadistically pierced, blown up, and mulched to a bloody pulp.” JESUS CHRIST WHAT “The fiend behind her tortured existence is Apos, an eternal being obsessed with sacrificing Rin to Yggdrasil, the tree of all life.” now you’re just dragging up any mythology word you can find “While Rin struggles to unravel the secrets of her endless agony,” good motivation “Apos lurks in the shadows, eager to tear into her ripe body” when you say ‘her body’ it’s weird, when you keep attaching adjectives to it it sounds like you’re into her being murdered all the time “and devour the memories of her countless lives. Rin’s no stranger to the realm of the dead,” didn’t you say she was immortal “but her next visit could last forever.” that kind of sounds better than being mulched to a bloody pulp

Guro makes its big time debut.

90 minutes. Gosford Park.

Maybe a little Futurama if I’m feeling frisky.

Link on the right. Click it.

Caramelized onions are so good.  A dish of them with a bit of toast and brie is my current answer in the last meal game.  When they’re cooked perfectly they can be a revelatory experience.  Complex, creamy, hugely flavorful and all it is is onions and butter.

There’s no better way to do this than the one described in the Bouchon cookbook, so that’s the method I’ll bring to you here.

8 vidalia or maui onions.  Slice thinly and evenly.  Evenly is important.  You don’t want them to disintegrate completely but you don’t want noodles either.  Use a mandoline if you’ve got one.  Pot on medium-high heat, a few knobs of butter, a sprinkle of salt.

I will add one thing to Bouchon’s method, which is a cheesecloth sachet containing a couple sprigs of thyme and a few broken up pieces of star anise.  As star anise cooks with caramelizing onions, they make a compound together that makes meaty things taste meatier.  It’s a magical effect.  Try it with rilette* sometime.

Lower the heat.  Regulate it so they just bubble gently.  Stir every fifteen minutes.  After an hour or so you can turn it up a bit, but keep it pretty low.  This is going to take between four and five hours, no kiddin’, stirring every fifteen minutes.  It takes this long because you want them to be thoroughly caramelized, not just on the surface but all the way through.  It’s not labor intensive, but you have to pay attention and you’ll have a better result if you happen to enjoy what you’re doing.  You can read a book, watch a Futurama marathon and stir during the commercials, whatever it takes.

This is not a completely finished batch.  They should be darker and more evenly darkened than this.

Watch them carefully toward the end.  Most of the moisture’s been cooked out and they’re more likely to brown rather than caramelize here.  You don’t want Maillard browning, which would make them bitter.  Be sure to scrape out the corners of the pot as you stir or else you’ll get onion cooked on as I have above.

* I will be posting a recipe for that soon too.

I’ve pushed my sidekick’s post down unfairly with these last two.  Crawl down there and read it.  Watch this movie.  It’s good stuff.

and Fortinbras goes down to the canal.

Danger due to what?  Danger due to what?

The Plucky Sidekick presents: Gosford Park.

With the ensemble cast to end all ensemble casts, it’s a murder mystery set during a hunting party at an English country house.

Both class and sexual tension abound! This will be especially fun for any of you that’ve been watching Jeeves & Wooster lately.

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